Thursday, June 10, 2010

A day for ME!

I thought I would just write about my day today because... I can.

See... Emma is at school today and my mom has Jill and Nathaniel at her house.
This means I have a day. Just for me. Ahhhhhhhhhh...
My plan was to go to Emma's school and have lunch with her then go to some of the flea markets and nice stores we have here. The ones I don't go to ever because my children are monkey kids...God love em'.
So I did the lunch thing with Em. You know... lunch with your 1st grader is always so informative. For instance today I was told " I can't wear the nurses band-aids because I can have latex. I'm allergic to latex. And the nurses band-aids have latex so I can't wear hers. ... because i'm allergic... to latex." and " hey, hey, my birthday party is in 2 days! IN TWO DAYS!" and " Hey Mrs. Sweeney..uh..? hahaha...Weeney? hahahahahahaha!" " and look... I can stick BOTH fingers up my nose!!"

And all of that in about 45 seconds. It was worth it though. Emma was so happy.

When I left I intended to go to aforementioned flea markets and "pretty pretty stores". But for some reason my back has been really really hurting the past month or so. So I ended up turning the church van around and coming home. Note* Not only is driving the massive church van good for ones pride..turns out all the rattling actually provided a "massage" of sorts for my back. :) Who ever said I wasn't optimistic really just doesn't know me. :p
Now here I am. Propped up on my couch with my sweet tea, the house wine of the south, tapping away on this keyboard thinking someone may actually care to read about one day in the life of me. The thing is. It doesn't matter if you read it. Because I have not written in SO long. And I love it. It's not for lack of material that I haven't written..Lord knows I have an endless supply. I just really haven't had the peace and quiet and frame of mind ( all at the same time) to sit down and do so. In the past weeks when I have sat down to write it either all came out as :

" ldkfjjhgeigafiugveahr;ihfv
bkjerbfiliuqgp9tyjkhbvjdafgvbeuq8gurkgjbljkgbnlviuasewgtjb,nazdigt!!!!!! nnihfkenfklnsiihfneirgyihnfvkne87(*^*(^Hjh98y45hkhi!!!!!! "

And well I just couldn't publish that for you all to read. :)

or

I fell asleep.

So its good, for me, to get to write. Even if it's just for me and even if it is utter nonsense that has no purpose or point. I appreciate the opportunity. This has been the first time in MONTHS that I have had the chance to be really still and really quiet and let all of my thoughts complete themselves.To a mom, well to me at least, and I think to most moms out t here. This is a rare, rare occurrence. And I don't think you REALLY get it unless you have been a mom. It's one thing to have my conversations interrupted, and even my "potty time" but my thoughts? Is nothing sacred anymore?!

So, even if at the end of the day I still don't have all the answers and there are still uncertainties... at least those thoughts were allowed to come in then go out ..rather than pile up in my head and make me CRAZY.

Not that I'm denying my insanity. It's just now I have to find another excuse for it. :)